Its been quite awhile since I last posted, took a bit of a breather from everything almost. Sometimes natural disasters have their way of putting people where they belong. In my case, Hurricane Irma just sucked, moved my life around a bit but couldn’t get me out of the keys 😋
After pregnancy and giving birth, I felt like I had lost myself. Got caught in what seemed to be like somewhat of a postpartum depression. I didn’t care what I looked like, I would forget to eat, or shower, everything was about the new baby, and I put myself last on the list. I felt like I didn’t have an identity anymore. I was just a mom, and I didn’t matter. My life was turning into a blur. I loved being a mom, it’s all I’d ever wanted. I would wake up and just experience the same cycle, no one is ever prepared for the way your life changes. I mean, everyone tells you, but you don’t really fully grasp what they say until you experience it for yourself. The highs and the lows. Your heart has never felt such love, your life has never seen such a beautiful reason, but your body has never felt such aches and pains, and your mind has never been so anxious and an emotional carnival. I lost sight of myself and I noticed it was taking a toll on everything. On me, my daughter, my relationship, my whole life really. People don’t realize how serious postpartum can get. Until one day I woke up and realized It was enough, I had to snap the fuck outta that one, make a change, and commit. And the only way I was going to begin acting the way my mind was thinking. It was the best way I know how to refresh myself, the woman’s right of passage into figuring out who they are, I died my hair. From my natural dirty blonde hair, I went to really, really blonde. I kept looking at myself in the mirror and kept thinking, blondes are too nice. DISCLAIMER I’m naturally a blonde and I want to return to blonde one day. I have nothing whatsoever against blondes. But it makes me the nice girl; it’s impossible for me to have made that change being an innocent, blonde. I mean, my mind, my body was asking for something a bit more drastic. so I went red. Fire bomb red, take no shit red, cliche as it sounds, my life changed all over again the moment I looked in the mirror after I saw my new look.
Since then I died it down to a wine red, but a change of scenery, if you will, was all I needed. Well that and ofcourse my heavy addiction to coffee to keep me awake throughout my daily adventures with my not so little baby girl.
I give it to you moms, who have dealt with, and are dealing with postpartum, sometimes it’s not as easy as just dying your hair, or taking a day off. It’s some serious business and I hope you each find your own healthy outlet to get you back to yourself !! As women we are strong and if we can deal with our children, pregnancy, child birth, and our husbands, we can get over any other obstacles! 💪🏻
misskeyzee 